Beer Fest Asia 2014

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(The Editor: Shit. We found this article in the folder too late…the Beerfest is over! Oh well, have a read and look forward to next year’s edition instead! Sorry Kornelius!) 


It’s the 6th installation of the Beer Fest Asia – a full weekend devoted to oiling up Asia through tasty beverages – through the gateway that is Singapore!

Permission to be smug as it looks like across Asia, we are quite the authority on what’s hot and what’s not!

Our roving reporter Kornelius reports!


It was a fairly balmy day when we stepped down from our pre-arranged cab. Putting on our shades and looking absolutely spiffy in our Armani suits and slicked-back hair, we breezed through the gates of Beer Fest 2014, flashing our special passes to anyone who considered stopping us.

Okay, I kid. It was a very hot day and I regretted wearing my black hoodie immediately upon stepping out of the cab, onto the grounds of the Singapore Flyer. On the bright side, pun not intended, the colours of the photos we took were very vibrant!



Stepping through the gates and into the premises, we were greeted by a sight not quite often seen in Singapore’s public domain. I was quite fascinated by it though my partner told me that a Jack Daniel’s was a very common thing to find in Singapore. But hey, don’t judge. It’s not often that I get to see a relatively phallic thing replicated in jumbo larger-than-me size.


This field reporter needs to get out more often.

Anyways, we finally found the exact location holding all the wines and good stuff and by the gods, SWEET BLESSED AIR-CONDITIONING. AND ALCHOHOL. LOTS OF IT.


The talks were really interesting through. There were quite a number of booths and we had lots of the Japanese, American and Swedish stuff.


The first station we went to had Moscatos on display. I believe, from what the presenter on board was saying, that this wine was imported from Australia – lightly scented with a sparkle to its flavour. The alcohol wasn’t overpowering and the colour had a very nice crystalline shade to it.


By now, it feels like we are traveling at the speed of light! Next station, Japan!


For heaven’s sake! Get it? Sake! Yeah. Pretty nice stuff. I’ll admit that this one might have gotten to my head a little.


My personal favourite station: The Midori booth and the melons on display. Er. I mean, Martinis – Muskmelon Midori to be specific.


Two lovely ladies serving us glasses of the good green stuff.


They had very lovely melons.

I wish I could have stayed at this one forever and downed a few more Midoris but life goes on… on to the tequila station, that is

This one had a bit of a stronger flavour to it. Lots and lots of pineapples. Very Mexican.


This one wasn’t too bad but it wasn’t really my cup of tea (I should I say booze?) due to the strong bitter aftertaste but I guess some people like that stuff.

We moved on to the Jim Bean’s display. I swore, for a moment, that I saw two bears but I guess it’s my imagination. It was a really cute bear.


Why don’t I get a free bear like that? Weren’t there two bears?


Maybe this guy knows where the bear went?


He didn’t… He just showed me all these drinks with honey in them. Maybe opening a bottle of this will attract the bear back. So I went forward to do so but before I could do anything about it, I was ushered over to the next station.

The next station served Japanese whiskies. Interesting stuff.


Ooo… sparkly!


Crush the mint, she said. It’d taste like mint, she said.

Still sad about not being able to get more Midoris and take a Jim Bean bear home, I decided to drown my crushing sadness with some whisky. I DID catch a distinct whiff of mint, like they said I would but what I mainly tasted was the whisky, which was very strong.

I think all the alcohol was starting to get to me so I took a sip and put it down. It was so pretty though. All that green.

We moved on to more whiskies!





Dat alcohol display!


And more whiskies! (This one’s Swedish.)


So I saw the Jim Bean bear pass me by. I called out to it but it ignored me. Filled with sorrow, I decided to drown myself in this stuff. It was dark and bitter like my soul. A soul without Midoris and Jim Bean bears.


Goodbye, cruel world.

Now excuse me while I go drunk-dial my ex. LOL. Totally enjoyed this trip to Beer Fest 2014! Can’t wait to see what new tricks next year may bring on to our sunny island that is five stars and a moon!

Until then!



Enjoyed this article? Concerned about our drunk reporter? Wanna burn us for sending in a lightweight to cover the event? Like, comment and share!








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