#mustbeISD

 

The Internal Security Department, is the mysterious, shifty eyed, moles everywhere department that keeps track of dissenting individuals and whisks them away at 3am in the morning (according to Kenneth Jeyetretnam).

The latest rumours in the Roy Ngerng saga include speculation that he has been hauled off by the ISD.

 

30

(confirm must be ISD…)

In case you think he’s paranoid – check out these instances that ACTUALLY HAPPENED BECAUSE OF ISD!

Before you get too excited, this is for entertainment purposes only. Don’t say we anyhow say ah.

 

1. That time I said Michael Palmer was damn goondu for getting caught, I spilled my teh peng.  #mustbeISD

2. I guess this explains why that cute boy never called. HE WAS A SPY! #mustbeISD

3. Starhub 3G network was down yesterday.  #mustbeISD

4. Singaporeans cannot play Watch Dogs on Steam until 27 June. #mustbeISD

5. Today I asked myself why Indranee kao pei about WP and Medishield, then a Swallowtail moth lao sai in my chicken rice. #mustbeISD

6. This guy on the jogging track flicks his sweat on me when he runs past. Confirmed got nanobot bugs in his sweat. #mustbeISD

7. My internet speed always faster when I access Straits Times. #mustbeISD

8. Last year I asked how come the GRC boundaries always change, then my client moved to Zimbabwe. #mustbeISD

9. When I was 6 years old, my favourite My Little Pony eraser went missing. #mustbeISD

10. That day I LOLed at a picture of PM Lee on SGAG, after that my desk lamp’s fuse blew. #mustbeISD

11. The convenience store at my block is always out of rainbow Paddle Pop. #mustbeISD

12. That time I say LHL stupid, then on that same day pang sai already my toilet bowl cannot flush. #mustbeISD (contributed by Jermyn Wee)

13. Haze not here when Roy being sued. #mustbeISD

14. That time I told the PAP guy I don’t want the MP to visit my flat. Then a caterpillar ate half my bougainvillea. #mustbeISD

15. Sexy girl flirting with me in the MRT. But I’m not hot. #mustbeISD

16. I always have less work when Parliament is in session. #mustbeISD

17. During my O-level Maths exam, a mosquito kept on biting my backside. #mustbeISD

18. That day I laughed at the YPAP video, I only got one chunk of lard in my mee pok. #mustbeISD

19. Every single Sports Day, the Milo van runs out of Milo by the time it’s my turn. #mustbeISD

20. Everyone always has more chai poh in their chwee kueh than me. #mustbeISD

 

Oh yeah – lest we forget. Better watch your back, you might be tailed by this ISD agent.. who was once Plainclothes Commandos:

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About the author

Samantha De Silva

Samantha De Silva develops and conducts courses in communication skills and also run writing workshops and mentorships. When she’s not doing this, she creates content, copy-edit and proofread for corporate, academic and creative projects. She also works on fun things like script analysis, writing for film and fiction projects and has been a contributing writer and voice talent on the satirical podcast, the mrbrown show, since 2008.

Samantha also blogs at: http://samanthadesilva.com

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