Why the Government should step in to save Zouk

10. Because without Zouk the birthrate will go down.


9. Because without Zouk, Hong Lim Park will be your next biggest Whine Bar.


8. Because Mambo night courses at Community Centers are. very. lame.


7. Because otherwise, the next nearest Zouk will be in Kuala Lumpur. And you don’t want to lose face to Kuala Lumpur.


6. It will help you shed the icy-cold-logic-technocratic skin.


5. Zouk’s audience hold the biggest pie for votes – the disgruntled 20something who thinks voting for opposition is cool


4. Because generations of Singaporeans grew up with Zouk. How many establishments can you actually use the words “generations of Singaporeans grew up with” anymore?


3. Because bureaucracy has copied too many of Zouk’s ideas – foam parties, mambo nights, beach parties. (And all of them also #culture #fail)


2. 23 years is no easy feat, for any business – and you’re letting it die because of property fat cats?


1. Because it is a living legend – known across the globe. 


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I am a satirical writer. I offend. And I urge you not to take me too seriously.

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