BEYOND WORDS

This goodbye post…

On 26 April, in Taipei, Taiwan, a four-year-old girl was decapitated alive, in front of her mother.

The pair were on their way to the subway station when 33-year-old, Wang Jingyu, overwhelmed the mother and decapitated the child.

The tragedy horrified the world.

The mother has written a goodbye post online, dedicated to her “Little Bulb”.

In it is a powerful message of love, this world deserves to read: “请大家帮我,好好抱抱你们身边最爱的人。很用力的、紧紧的、深深的,抱抱他们,告诉他:‘我爱你’” she writes (Please help me everyone, to hold your loved ones beside you properly and tightly. Use all your strength, tightly, deeply, hug them and tell them ‘I love you’.)

 

Here is the original post, followed by its English translation.

Screen Shot 2016-03-31 at 12.51.39 AM

“当下,血肉模糊,我知道我已经挽回不了。咚…的一声,我知道他解脱了,我跟她说‘宝贝,结束了’ ”

除了家人给我看的记者会影音档和文字档之外,其他新闻我还无力消化。谢谢媒体工作者完整了呈现了记者会里我的发言。当下,不知道为什么,是哭不出来的,直到做完笔录。

我真的好想她。

直到陪三个孩子们踏进他们四个一起睡的房间,突然,我就崩溃了,姐姐也终于在此时开始放声哭泣,我们聊了好久好久,我一整晚,脑海终究只有‘如梦一场’我多么希望明天醒来,发现这是一场梦,小灯泡就跑来撒娇。

我真的好想她。

认识我的人都应该了解我,我凡事尽心尽力,我凡事问心无愧,我理性,我乐观、我也坚强,于此,我奋力的独自的拉住犯罪者,我真的很尽力。

走都走了,我真的很希望能唤回些什么,唤回些爱,唤回些什么,让她值得!

我真的好想她。

请大家帮我,好好抱抱你们身边最爱的人。很用力的、紧紧的、深深的,抱抱他们,告诉他:‘我爱你’
有时候,真的是命。

周六,早上姐姐学校园游会,我们全家出动,小灯泡看到他之前的幼幼班老师、同学,那天下午David是要带姐姐回花莲扫墓的,前一晚,临时决定带小灯泡一起回去,小灯泡看到了好久不见的亲戚们。那一天,我们下午只有三小时,原本想回家休息的,但我们去了共学,小灯泡跟他的朋友们玩的很开心,很多爸妈也帮我们拍了很棒的照片。那一天,小灯泡见到好多好多的人,或许就是上帝在安排他做最后的道别。

我真的好想她。

今早,平常晚起的小灯泡,在姐姐出门上学前起床,乐的跟我说他今天很早起,有跟姐姐说byebye。早上,难得的只有我们两个的时光,骑了他爱的摩托车载他出门处理事情,回家,他拿着水果,坐在大窗边的卧榻上,看着窗外,我问他:你在干嘛?小灯泡说:‘我在吃水果看风景呀!这里的风景好美,这个世界好漂亮’或许,就是在做他最后的回顾。
只可惜,我们早上还在讨论下个月生日要订什么蛋糕,要邀请谁一起庆祝。只可惜,差三天生日的我们,没办法一起庆生了。

我真的好想她。

还好,昨晚我抱着他跟她说我爱他,按摩着他直到入睡。还好,我们年初有出国旅行一趟,带他去了想去的迪士尼,带他坐了飞机。

或许,上帝硬是在我怀第三胎的时候,把小海豹也挤进来,让我有个跟小灯泡这么像的小海豹,是要让日后小海豹能替小灯泡陪我。

我,真的很想小灯泡。

在这个少子的年代,我没有因为我生了四个孩子上电视,却因为我少了一个孩子上电视,好像,有那么点讽刺?

谢谢大家的关心,我真的知道,谢谢大家提供的各种资源,我们需要时间消化、整理,谢谢大家,请不要打电话给我和David,你们的讯息我都有看到,我需要时,我绝对不会客气,我知道这时候不靠你们,还要等什么时候?

我现在只想要鉴定赶快结束,还给我小灯泡,让她尸首合一,让我抱抱他,好好跟她说话。我真的好想你,宝贝!”

***

“At that instance, the gore blinded everything and I knew it was too late to do anything. With a thud, I knew she was liberated and I said to her, ‘Baby, it’s all over’”.

Other than the video and text recordings from the press conference shown to me by family members, I have no energy to digest other news reports. Thank you to all the media professionals who presented the views I expressed in full during the press conference. At the moment, I don’t know why I just can’t cry, until I am done writing this post.

I really miss her.

It wasn’t till I was accompanying my other three kids to sleep in their four-person room that I just broke down all of a sudden. Little Bulb’s older sister started crying at the same moment. We talked for a long time. For the whole night, I felt as if I was in a dream which I wish I can wake up from soon. In the dream, Little Bulb will run up to me to get my affection.

I really miss her.

Those who know me should understand that I always do my best in everything I do; I have a clear conscious; I am rational; I am optimistic; and I am strong. As such, I did fight hard to pull and stop the attacker on my own, I really did my best.

She is already gone, but I really wish I can recall something. Recall love? Recall what to make her life worth it?

I really miss her.

Please help me everyone, to hold your loved ones beside you properly and tightly. Use all your strength, tightly, deeply, hug them and tell them ‘I love you’.

Sometimes, it is really fate.

Saturday morning, our whole family attended Little Bulb’s sister’s school fair. Little Bulb met her ex-childcare teachers and classmates at the fair. On the same day noon, David was going to bring just Little Bulb’s sister to Hualien to pay respect at our ancestor’s grave. The night before, we decided last minute to bring Little Bulb along. Little Bulb got to catch up with many relatives whom we have not met for a long time. That day, we only had three hours in in afternoon and initially wanted to go home to rest, but we visited the coed school instead and Little Bulb and her friends played happily. A lot of other parents helped us took many great photos. That day, Little Bulb met many many people. Maybe this is God arranging for the final goodbye.

I really miss her.

This morning, Little Bulb, who usually wakes up late, woke up really early before her older sister left for school. She even told me happily that she got to bid her sister ‘byebye’. It was one of those rare morning when the two of us had some alone time. I brought her out on her favourite motorbike to get some tasks done outside. When we got home, she held a fruit and sat on the couch by the window.  Looking out of the window, I asked her: “What are you doing?”

“I am eating my fruit while enjoying the scenery! The scenery here is so beautiful. This world is so beautiful!” replied Little Bulb.

Maybe, this was her sharing her last memories of this world.

It is such a pity. We were still discussing what cake to buy and who to invite for our birthdays’ celebration next month. Our birthdays are just three days apart from each other, but we won’t get to celebrate it together anymore.

I really miss her.

Fortunately, I hugged her and told her I love her last night. I massaged her to sleep. Fortunately, we traveled abroad together on New Year’s Eve and we visited Disneyland together. She got to ride on a plane.

Maybe, when God blessed me with my third child, Little Bulb, a fourth, Little Seal came after as an added blessing. Little Seal is so much like Little Bulb. In the days to come, Little Seal will accompany me on behalf of Little Bulb.

I really miss Little Bulb.

In this age of low birth rate, I did not appear on television for giving birth to four children, instead, I appeared on television because I lost one. Isn’t it ironic?

Thank you everyone for your concerns. I know. Thank you everyone for all the resources and help rendered. We need time to settle down. Thank you everyone. Please do not call David and I. We have seen all your messages. We need time. We definitely would not hesitate to reach out if we need assistance because I know if I don’t reach out when I need help now, when else?

Right now, I just hope the autopsy can be done soon. Return me my Little Bulb. Let her body be in one piece. Let me hug her and say to her proper: “I really miss you baby!”

 

About the author

The Editor

Hello, I am the Editor of FiveStarsAndAMoon :)

View all posts

Share your thoughts!