Angry with China? What for? lol…

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When politically charged tabloids and medias want you to be angry, you know that you should do the exact opposite.

The slime cannon of China, the “Global Times” published articles claiming ordinary Chinese people want the tanks “melted down”. And to make sure that people in Singapore read it, they’ve written it in English instead of Chinese.

Really Global Times? That’s your way of pissing us of?

We’re a bunch of practical people that have lived decades under practical leadership in a very practical environment. Heck, we’ve even been proven to be a most emotionless people.

Burn our flag? Yeah, whatever.

Call us a piece of snot? Sure.

Threaten to skin the Singaporean cat? If that’s what you want bro.

Claim that Hainanese Chicken Rice and Chilli Crab originated from your country? Ok, now that may be pushing it too far.

The thing is, it takes a lot…a lot to get Singaporean pissed off. We understand that the field of politics doesn’t require much brain nor qualifications and many political players are still led by nose with testosterone and ego.

WASHINGTON, DC - JULY 23: Donald Trump listens at the Trump International Hotel Washington, D.C Groundbreaking Ceremony at Old Post Office on July 23, 2014 in Washington, DC. (Photo by Paul Morigi/WireImage)

The Global Times and the South China Morning Post have been trying very hard to piss Singaporeans off. They really, really want Singapore to be annoyed, to hopefully take to the streets in protest.

When you rationalise it, this issue really revolves around two things:

a.) Negligent paperwork
b.) China to remind Taiwan and Hong Kong who is in charge

Taiwan had recently had an election that wasn’t in China’s favour. It takes every chance it gets to remind the world that Taiwan is not an independent country.

Poor Hong Kong has to comply with whatever Beijing tells them. Now, if you have to listen to whatever a bigger nation tells you to do, doesn’t that make you a muppet?

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Oh Hong Kong pro-democracy advocates, where are you now? Paging Joshua Wong…why so silent? If you’re a commercial port and you pride yourself on “one country two systems”, why do you allow yourself being directed left and right by Beijing?

Honestly though, you couldn’t fault China. As this magazine had written before; if you find a company of armoured military vehicles landing in your country, especially when it has arrived from an enemy renegade province, you couldn’t possibly ignore it. For all you know, it is merely the fault of some Chinese shipping clerk whom couldn’t tell the difference between “tanks” and “thanks”.

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For all those who think that “military data had been captured”, please – do you think the SAF is stupid enough to send sensitive military equipment via commercial shipment? China probably has no use for it. With a full space program and nuclear capabilities, there is really nothing new for them.

So if the China/Taiwan/Hong Kong narrative is “bully singapore” – yeah sure, whatever. If it amuses the 3  countries Chinese territories whom are wrestling power amongst each other, go for it. It is none of our business. China isn’t our enemy, neither is Hong Kong nor Taiwan. We know how these medias have to behave and how they’re used as pawns in the game of diplomatics.

There was a nice statement by Minister for Foreign Affairs, Vivian Balakrishnan: Singapore will not allow any single issue to hijack its longstanding, wide-ranging relationship with China.

“It will be a footnote on how to do things strictly, carefully and by the law. It’s not a strategic incident,” said the Minister.

Strictly. Carefully. And by the law. That is how Singapore had always dealt with its problems and that is how it will be managed this time.

No amount of name calling, media prodding and mud throwing by tabloids is going to annoy us.

 

 

About the author

madmonk

I am a satirical writer. I offend. And I urge you not to take me too seriously.

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